Balance

It really amazes me how much all areas of my life affect one another. For instance, if I don't get enough sleep throughout the week then my relationships suffer. My attitude starts going downhill and I don't feel like giving my all. If I'm not spiritually on track, meaning I don't invest enough time in prayer, meditation, and reading the Bible or other devotional material, that also will have an affect on my relationships, my attitude towards work, or even my physical life. Is there such a thing as balance in one's life?

I know that I need 6 or 7 hours of sleep each night or I get cranky. So, that's 49 hours per week of sleep that I need. I also believe that I need to invest time with my work. I've been averaging about 53 hours per week, so that leaves me 66 hours per week out of 168 to divide up between physical activity, family, relational, and spiritual. I tithe with my money, so why not tithe with my time? Give God 2.4 hours of every day and that still leaves me 49.2 hours to invest into working out, family, and getting my to-do list done. 49.2 hours seems like a lot of time, but my kids are still begging for time with me. And do I really invest 2.4 hours every day with God?

Where is my time really going? Do you know? Do you have balance?

Pressing on with Excellence,

Keith

The Sharpening

I would like to write about accountability. Why is it important? There was a study done on horses. One horse by himself could pull 2,500 pounds. They repeated the test with two horses and together they were able to pull 12,500 pounds. That’s five times as much as by themselves. I think the same holds true for people. Not by strapping them to a weight, but by strapping them together by accountability.

I know if I talk to someone about a problem I’m having, for some reason I’m able to think a little clearer. Especially when that problem rises again. It is easier to let go and not do the wrong thing if I know I’m going to have to tell someone about it.

What if you knew a person was going to specifically ask you about a character defect or ask how you were doing on being kind, loving, and generous? Don’t you think that has the possibility to change the way you act? Proverbs 27:17 says that as iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another. This is true. Although it might seem scary to share some or all of your innermost thoughts with someone, it will help you to become the man or woman that God wants you to be and it happens a lot faster than trying to do it on your own. A problem shared is a problem cut in half.

Pushing towards excellence.

Keith

Perpetual Forgiveness Machines

Why are Christians so judgmental? I know I fall into it. Not really on purpose, I just have a slant towards measuring others critically. Not all the time and I’m far better than I used to be about this. The Bible says “Judge not, lest you be judged.” [Matthew 7:1] Jesus himself said, “Forgive us our trespasses AS we forgive those who trespass against us.” [Matthew 6:12] That AS implies that with the same measure that we use, it will be given back to us. Still it seems for me that I forget where I was, or rather how I was, when I found Jesus. I was at the bottom and capable of anything. I think that I sometimes forget what I’m capable of and that plus a little insecurity of my own is why I judge others.

So what’s the tool I can use to stop being so judgmental? How about what Jesus said: forgiveness. Forgiveness towards others stops me in my tracks for judging. I cannot be critical and forgiving at the same time. Also, if I forgive myself I won’t have insecurity in the first place. God-esteem is far better than self-esteem. Do you have trouble with this or am I the only one? We need to become perpetual forgiveness machines.

Keith
Pressing On With Excellence

Negative Spirals

Low pressure system over Iceland. Image from NASA, taken on 2003-09-04. http://visibleearth.nasa.gov/view_rec.php?id=6204

I want to write about negative spirals because I seem to have little or no control of my thought process at the time. The endless cycle would go something like this: Sin, then self condemnation, to discouragement, to unforgiveness, then back to sin. What if I could change this? What if I didn’t do this any more? Was this even possible and what would that look like?

This whole process can be short circuited or stopped. It would look more like this: Sin, ask forgiveness, forgive myself, and move on. I suppose this is the way it goes if you are a normal human being, but for me, for years I would go through these negative cycles. I don’t believe that this is God’s will for anyone. How can this bring glory to God? It can’t and doesn’t. How do you stop this?

First, I would say that you should pray and ask God for help recognizing this. Second, when you realize what you’re doing, stop and ask yourself: does this kind of  thinking bring glory to God? Third, I used Tommy Newberry’s Five Questions to help me learn how to think differently.

These questions are based on Philippians 4:8. A 4:8 question is any question which extracts a positive answer. Examples are: Who are Five people who love you the most? What are Five things you’re good at? What are Five things you’re looking forward to in the next week? What are Five things you’re grateful for right now? What are Five of your strengths or positive traits? Any question which gets you thinking about what is true, good, and right; things that are pure and lovely, and good things in others; and anything you can praise God for and be glad about is a 4:8 question.

Keith
Pressing On With Excellence

Spiritual Brillo® pads

Let’s talk about relationships. We all have them. The way I see it there is three types of relationships that I have; with God, others, and myself.

 I have a relationship with God.  That’s what the tools are all about. They are designed to remove blockages and to grow my relationship with God.

I have a relationship with others. If that relationship is stressed then my relationship with God is blocked. God is present in others and one way he speaks is through others. If I’m mad or judgmental or criticizing or complaining about someone then I’m effectively putting up a wall between myself and God. I sometimes think God puts people in my life that are like a spiritual Brillo® Pad. They just rub me wrong or we just don’t see eye to eye. Anyway, God uses these people, Christian or not, to help me to become a better person. I used to sit around and complain about these people until I realized that God was using them to shine me up for him.

The third relationship is with myself. This is really not often looked at. Yes, I do have a relationship with myself. I believe we all do. I talk to myself all day long and I have found that if my relationship with myself is messed up, it too will have a tremendous effect on the others. For instance; if I have unforgiveness towards myself I become bitter toward others. I may be easily offended, or become angry when they don’t perform the way I think they should. This is really a pride issue, but I think it also stems from unforgiveness. But it causes me to be judgmental and insecure. (If someone makes me mad there’s a pretty good chance that there is something in that person that reminds me of myself.) And if I’m not right in any of these relationships. It will mess with both of the others.

What’s the tool to use to fix this. Well, here’s what I did. For example: I would be driving down the road and someone would merge and cut me off. I would be mad. And it would go something like this: I would call them some name. Then I might even make a gesture. Then, I would realize that this is not the person that I want to be so I would ask God to forgive that person for being an idiot and I would ask God to forgive me for judging that person. Then I would say out loud to myself, “Keith, I forgive you.” It took around six months of this before I realized that when someone would do that it didn’t hardly bother me any more.

 Self forgiveness is one of the biggest tools that I can use to improve both my relationship with others and God. How are you doing at forgiving yourself? Do you think about your relationship with yourself? Do you have your own tools for forgiving yourself that you could share with me?

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

A Look Back

This has been the hardest blog for me to write because I want to stay positive, but I know that there has been a lot of people that have gone through some rough times this year.

Well now that we’ve talked about staying in the moment in the last post, and because it is coming upon a new year, I want to look back a little at the past year. Maybe it didn’t turn out the way you thought it would.

But I also know if you look hard enough you can find good. Pain can be good sometimes. God uses it to draw us to himself. Have you gone through some pain this past year? Did you take that pain to the Great Physician? He wants to heal your pain and bandage your wounds.

I had an over all good year this year. I was able to meet some goals that I had made at the end of last year. I pushed myself further than I thought I could go. I took up a new hobby that I never thought I would. I was able to get in the best physical condition of my life as an adult. And I paid off some debts.

After that I injured my back and was off work for 2 months. So, I had a little of both good and bad. I believe the good has outweighed the bad. I’m sure that I know God better now than I ever have in the past.

I sometimes think that God wants to be involved in the good in our lives. It’s easy to run to God during the bad times, but do you include him in the good times as well? Thank Him for all that he does. Have you ever praised God in the bad times? It’s hard to do and seems counterintuitive, but I believe that God wants us to. For me it seems weird, but if I trust and praise him in the bad times I don’t have to stay in the pain as long. God is God and he allows us to experience pain. When we learn to run to God in our pain, it helps us to have empathy for others and to grow closer to God.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.” 2Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV)

Keep watching, God has good things ahead.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

The Present of the Present

Well, since it’s Christmas, I thought it only fitting that I should look at another gift that God gives us. That is the gift of the Present. Right now is where we can enjoy the peace that God gives us. Not in the past or in the future, only right now.

Too many times I find myself worrying about what is going to happen in the future or re-hashing what has happened in the past. There is nothing wrong with mulling over what has happened in the past. Especially if it concerns making things right. But I can’t spend all my time there. If I do then I miss out on what God is doing in my life right now. It is also good to think about the future and make goals to give me something to strive for. But if I spend all of my time there, once again I miss out on what God is doing right now.

Sometimes I worry about only having a small amount of money in my wallet till payday. And I’m not grateful that I have money in my wallet right now. I don’t know what the future may bring but right now I’m okay. I need to think about how good it is right now rather than to worry about what it could be. I don’t know what the future holds, but God does.
But at this moment I have food, clothes, money, and a place to live. I have a wonderful wife and 2 great kids. Things are really better than I deserve.

What are you thinking about right now? The Bible says in James 1: 17 that everything that is good and perfect comes from God. Can you see anything good in your life right now? If so then know that God is working in your life right now. The time is now. It is the only place that you can enjoy the Presence of God.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

The Choice

Once you believe that there is a loving, forgiving God then you have to make a choice. Do I go back to the former life that I was living or do I allow God to set the direction of my life? If you are anything like me and you truly have the gift of desperation there is really only one choice and it’s time to choose. That is it. Just turn your will and life over to God. Here’s the way I look at it. My best choices got me to this point so far and it didn’t work out so well for me. I will make this choice and see what happens. If it goes well, then good. If it doesn’t, then I can always go back. I can get a refund of my misery and I won’t miss out on anything. I really don’t have anything to lose.

How do you know when you have made this choice? You have some peace and serenity. Things don’t bother you as much. This is a process over and over, turning your will over to God. You can and should use these three tools together. Use the desperation to drive you to forgive others, ask forgiveness of yourself from God, and forgive yourself. Then choose to turn your will over to God. Simplified version is:  I can’t, He can and I think I will let him. Every day of our lives we have to do this and the more we do this, the easier it becomes and the more peace you will have. Over time it will become second nature but for now you have to practice it.

Let go and let God.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

The Solution

I would like to write a little about the solution: God. I couldn’t describe God’s character. If I spent the rest of these blogs trying, I wouldn’t be able to.  I do  however like this song by Fredrick M. Lehman:

           The love of God is greater far
           Than tongue or pen can ever tell;
            It goes beyond the highest star,
            And reaches to the lowest hell.

            Could we with ink the ocean fill,
            And were the skies of parchment made;
            Were every stalk on earth a quill,
            And every man a scribe by trade.
            To write the love of God above
            Would drain the ocean dry;
            Nor could the scroll contain the whole
            Though stretched from sky to sky.

            Oh Love of God, How rich and Pure!
            How measureless and strong.
            It shall forever more endure
            The saints and angels song.

This song is right on target. God’s love is amazing! For so long before I got sober I just couldn’t really believe that He could love me. Because the person that I was, was so bad, but God IS love. He can’t help but love you. That’s His nature. He is not limited in his ability to love. What’s more, he knows all of our past, present, and future sins and loves you anyway. I have a hard time wrapping my head around that. I think that is because I had a hard time forgiving myself for all the things that happened in my life. And because of my lack of forgiveness of myself, that blocked me from allowing myself to be loved by God and to accept God’s love. So forgiveness will be a good start for our toolbox. Use it early and often. For others and especially for yourself. It is enough to know that God loves you.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

The Gift of Desperation part 2

Desperation all by itself is very dangerous. At least it was for me. Thoughts of suicide were often flowing through my mind. But I had one thing that kept me from pulling the trigger. That was a teeny tiny bit of faith. Faith of a mustard seed is what the Bible calls it. This is what it really was: that there’s an outside chance that there might be, just maybe, a God out there somewhere. And that he might just care for me. Maybe. Though I wouldn’t know why. That is all the faith that I could muster. But when I was able to muster that much faith, that was enough for God to prove himself to me.

The solution to the problem is God. How to find him and develop a relationship with him. This is what my blogs will be about.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith

THE GIFT OF DESPERATION

I was given the gift of desperation. Gift you say? Yes, I believe that desperation can be a gift from God. Desperation motivated me  to take action. If you can recall the feelings of desperation that you felt when you realized you had a problem, there is a good chance of not repeating that action again.

Before I was sober, my mother and a lot of others would pray for me that I would realize my powerlessness over alcohol. I believe God answered their prayers with the gift of desperation. I also believe that is why I never went back to drinking. I have a healthy fear of going back to the way it used to be.

I see far too many people who don't have enough willingness to try new things to improve their relationship with God and they go backwards. It's like riding a bike up a hill. You push one pedal down, then another  and you get tired and stop pushing. You may be able to coast for a little bit but pretty soon you stop. Then you start rolling backwards. Have you ever tried to ride a bike backwards down a hill? Crash! The gift of desperation enables us to keep pushing the pedal down.

Desperation with a good healthy fear can be the beginning of a whole new life.

Pressing On With Excellence,
Keith